Damn You to Liverpool
by Death-Muncher
Summary: AU Sirius has grown up in the factory district of Liverpool with his alcaholic father. After finding out he's a wizard how will this young Liverpool punk handle this whole new world.
1. Chapter 1

Damn You to Liverpool

(title might change at a later date)

Author's Note: checks outside for flying pigs due to the lack of flying pigs, Sirius Black, the Marauders and anything relating to Harry Potter still aren't mine.

Chapter 1

_Liverpool, England_

Apparating in a deserted alleyway, two blocks from her destination. The Hogwarts representative straitened her robes un-necessarily and the preceded to peer out of the alleyway, searching for any sign of muggles, there were none in sight.

Striding out of the alley, she made her way quickly up the street. Suddenly two boys burst out of a side-street, punching and kicking each other for all they were worth.

"You fucking prick, don't you ever say that about my sister again!" yelled a boy with short blond hair.

"I'll call that whore whatever the hell I want to call her, you mother-fucker!" yelled the other boy, this boy had almost chin length black hair.

The Hogwarts representative dodged out of their way just in time to avoid being bowled over. She briefly considered just leaving the two muggle boys to fight out their differences, but decided that her conscience wouldn't be able to handle it.

"Stop that this instant!" the boys paid her as much mind as a minotaur would pay to a head of cabbage, in other words… none. "CEASE AND DESIST IMMEDIATELY!" she yelled, both boys paused long enough to glare at her and the dark haired boy snarled "shut up, you old cunt." And then they continued fighting.

She had never been so shocked….so…so… offended, so insulted! Two boys who couldn't be more than eleven had just called her _old!_ She was only 27, that wasn't _old, _was it? Wait a minute, did they just call her an _old _cunt? Why the boldness and cheek of those two little… She couldn't come up with a word vile enough to describe the two boys beating the crap out of each other in front of her.

Marching forward she grabbed the black haired boy by the scruff of this neck and tore him away from the other boy with a strength you wouldn't expect from her slim form.

"HOW DARE YOU? I have half a mind to find your parents and inform them of your disgraceful behavior!" she roared.

The boys were speechless and just stared at the odd stranger, who had just interrupted their fight and stood before the in a light green ankle length skirt, a white, button up, fitted shirt and a long dark green robe. They remained speechless for another couple seconds before they exchanged a dumb founded glance and then simultaneously burst into laughter.

She was shell shocked, she'd just yelled at them and now they were laugher at her! Gritting her teeth she asked in a voice dangerously calm "What's so funny?"

If anything the blond haired one laughed even harder. The dark haired boy looked up at her with shocking blue eyes and a barely contained smirk and said "you'd have to have half a mind not to be able to figure that out!" Both boys burst into new peals of laughter.

So that's what their hysterics were about. Stupid, stupid, immature cretins. Glaring at the boys she seethed in rage. Just as she was about to burst and start calling down the fires of hell upon them, the dark haired boy pulled himself out of her grasp and putting his arm around the other boys shoulder, they turned and headed down the street together.

She stood there for several seconds in a shocked silence before spinning around stalking up the street, green robes billowing behind her. Stepping over several broken bottles beside a trash can and carefully avoiding the cigarette butts that littered the doorstep of number 12 Grimmauld place, she raised her hand and knocked on the door. Stepping back from the door she waited… and continued to wait, just as she was about to knock again the door was wrenched open by a tall, black haired man, who's appearance suggested that he'd forgotten to shave that morning and was maybe a bit hungover.

"What do you want?" he asked irritably "if your selling something, your wasting your time, so you can just bugger off."

Slightly taken back she stepped and floundered for words "No, I… um… I'm not here to sell you anything. I'm a representative for Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, I'm here to discuss the possibility of enrolling your son in it." She replied swiftly regaining her composure.

The man looked at her for several seconds, his expression unchanging, slowly his brow furrowed in confusion. Looking at her uncertainly he said in a doubtful voice "uh… maybe you should come in, Miss…"

"Campbell, Nikki Campbell" Nikki replied sticking out her hand to shake his. Orion Black took it somewhat hesitantly. Then stepped back and let her into his house.

"Sorry 'bout the mess" he muttered, clearing off a chair, in what Nikki could only assume was the living room. "Do you want anything to drink? Coffee, juice, water… beer?" Orion asked her uncomfortably, shifting from foot to foot and running a hand through his hair.

"I'm fine, thanks." She told him with a smile that she hoped was comforting "is your son at home? I'd very much like to talk with him about this opportunity."

"No, he's out right now. But he should be back soon, he forgot his skateboard." Orion replied.

"I see… well down to business. Your son has been accepted into the most prestigious wizarding school in all of Europe." Nikki recited her speech from memory.

"When you say wizarding… you mean as in magic n' stuff?" Orion asked skeptically.

Approximately half-an-hour later, after Nikki had given Orion Black a lengthy explanation on the wizarding world and after she had transfigured Orion's rug into a wombat and back into a rug, the conversation finally returned to the fact that Orion's son was a wizard and as such should attend Hogwarts.

"So Hogwarts is a private school?" Orion asked

"Sort of, it's a boarding school, so your son would stay there for the school year and he'd be aloud home for holidays and the summer" Nikki explained.

"Does it cost money to send him there?" Orion asked uncomfortably.

"There is no entrance fee, you'd only need to buy the school supplies, the school uniform is supplied." Nikki replied reassuringly.

"O.k. then… I'm not a rich man you see… so I wouldn't be able to afford any fancy schmancy stuff…. And where exactly is he supposed to buy these supplies?" Orion asked awkwardly.

"In Diagon alley, I can take him there today if you'd like." Nikki offered kindly.

At that moment the front door burst open and a young dark haired boy hurried in. "Hi dad, I forgot my board…" he began, but trailed off as he stared at Nikki in horror.

Nikki stared into the boy's startling blue eyes, her thoughts shooting around in her head like a couple of blundgers.

"Sirius, this is Nikki Campbell. She's from that school that was sending you those weird letters. Miss Campbell this is my son, Sirius." Orion introduced the two, oblivious to the look of horror that his son was giving Nikki and the returned look of intense dislike that Nikki was giving his son.

"We've met" Nikki told him shortly.

Orion looked at her oddly "you have?" his eyes narrowed and he looked between the two suspiciously.

Sirius appeared to be trying to edge his way out of the room. "Well, it's been real nice meeting you, I would love to stay and chat but I really need to be going now. You know, places to go, things to do…" he took another step back and made a break for the door but his father was faster and grabbed his arm and pulled him back into the living room and sat him down on a dirty brown arm chair. Carefully placing himself between Sirius and the door, Orion leaned against the door frame and surveyed Sirius through narrowed, suspicious eyes.

"What'd he do?" he asked Nikki simply.

A feeling of swiftly approaching revenge washed over Nikki and she opened her mouth to quickly recount the entire story "On my way here, I was almost bowled over by your son and another boy who were fighting and then when I attempted to interfere he called be something which I will not repeat, but it was extremely rude and vulgar and then ran off with the other boy."

Orion turned to Sirius and asked in a stern voice "Is this true boy?"

Sirius looked up at him reluctantly and nodded as he said "Vince's sister was being a bitch and kept trying to put make-up and shit on me and she spilt nail polish on my jeans. So I called her a bitch and Vince got mad and we started fighting and then she came along and broke it up."

Nikki was staring at the boy in shock, he'd said bitch in front of his father and his father didn't appear to have noticed!

Orion looked at Sirius sternly "What have I told you 'bout fighting? Don't do it for no good reason, so what if Vince's sister is a chit, just leave. And if Vince gets pissed and takes a swing at you try and calm 'im down. Only fight if you 'ave to, got it?" Sirius nodded "and you had no right to be rude to Miss Campbell, mouthing off at strangers is just dumb, specially if they haven't done nuffing to you."

Nikki blanched, that wasn't the type of dressing down that she had been expecting. That little slime covered piece of diseased rat feces had just gotten away with a slap on the wrist.

"Now apologies to Miss Campbell for being a wanker and you'd better hope she forgives you boy, cuz' she's offered you something real special like and if you've screwed up your chance of going, I'm going to be right pissed off." Orion told Sirius gravely.

Reluctantly Sirius turned to Nikki and opened his mouth to apologies "I'm sorry for almost knocking you over and for being a right idiot to you, when you tried to help."

Equally as reluctant Nikki was forced to accept his apology. "It's alright, lets just forget about it and start over." She told him with a forced smile. "You've been accepted-into-hogwarts-school-of-witchcraft-and-wizardy-I'll-take-you-to-Diagon-alley-to-get-your-school-supplies-and-introduce-you-into-the-wizarding-world." Nikki told him all in one breath through gritted teeth.

"Wizarding world? What drugs are you on?" Sirius asked raising an eyebrow.

"Sirius!" his father exclaimed and reached out and hit him upside the head "you watch that tongue of yours!"

"I'm going to ignore that comment" Nikki told him sternly and then continued on in a very much abbreviated speech of what she'd told Orion Black earlier.

"So your saying I'm a wizard?" he asked suspiciously, Nikki nodded vigorously "Well that's complete and utter bollocks! Dad, I can't believe you listened to thi-"

Sirius trailed off as Nikki, tired of Sirius's big mouth, transfigured the coffee table into a very large tortoise that looked around vaguely confused. Sirius just sat were he was staring at the tortoise that was formally his coffee table. He summed up his feelings in two word "holy shit!"


	2. Chapter 2

Damn You to Liverpool

Authors Note: thank you to everyone who has reviewed. hangs head in shame Sirius Black and the marauders and all things Harry Potter, _still _aren't mine!

Chapter 2

_In a cab, driving along St. Vincent save. Somewhere in Liverpool_

"I don't wanna go!" Sirius whined in the back of the taxi, his arms folded across his chest petulantly.

"Be that as it may, your father thinks that this will be a good opportunity for you." Nikki told Sirius wryly "be happy, this way you won't end up working in some musty, grubby factory." As soon as she said this Nikki realized she'd said something wrong, Sirius's face had immediately closed up and he wore a dark scowl, which he was sending in her direction.

"What's wrong with working in a factory?" Sirius demanded crossly, leaning forward in his seat a bit.

Thinking quickly, she worded her response carefully "Usually factory work is the end of the line for person, it's not a very… uh… forwarding career." She glanced at him in the rear-view mirror and saw that what she said had not abated his resentment.

"My Dad works in a factory" he said in a low voice and glared at her with an intense dislike.

"Oh…" Nikki said as she mentally kicked herself repeatedly.

But Sirius wasn't finished yet "Two of my uncles work in factories, one of them is the manager of a factory!" there was such a note of pride in his voice that Nikki almost felt bad… almost. "And another one my uncles, uncle Jim used to be a factory worker before he went to jail; he'll be out soon and he'll probably go back to working at the factory, either that or he'll work as a mechanic for my grand-father. Working in a factory is a perfectly respectable occupation." He finished defiantly.

Nikki half turned in her seat to look at him "I'm extremely sorry for insulting your family." She told him seriously, he didn't reply but his glare lessened and he turned and looked out the window at the damp, dreary street that they were driving along.

Neither of them spoke for the continuation of the cab ride, finally the cab came to a stop in front of a small antique book store. Nikki paid the cabi and got out.

"Come on Sirius, this way" Nikki said uncertainly, unsure of how to deal with this child that so obviously resented her. He didn't reply but did as she said and trailed after her, scuffing his sneakers on the damp cement.

As Nikki opened the door to the musty little book store a bell tinkled above them, as she looked at Sirius while holding the door for him, she realized that she was going to have to try and fix the rift that lay between them.

"Sirius," she said gently, he looked up at her "Sirius, hold up a sec. I think we need to have a chat." Sirius just looked at her, his face expressionless. "I realize that we didn't get off to a very good start and so far our impressions of each other have just gotten worse and worse. What say you, to starting over? A clean slate?"

Sirius looked at her for several seconds and then with a dead-pan face said "Hello, my name is Sirius Black, I'm 11 years old." He held out his hand.

Taking his hand, Nikki shook it firmly "It's a pleasure to meet you Mr. Black, my name is Nikki Campbell and I'm 27. It is my delight to inform you that you are a wizard." She said with a slight grin.

Sirius grinned back at her "the pleasures all mine, it's so kind of such a _young_ lady to take me to buy my school stuff at that Dragon Alley or whatever it was you said it was called."

Nikki started towards the back of the shop; over her shoulder she continued her conversation with Sirius "if Mr. Black accepts, it would please me greatly to buy him an ice-cream at Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlor."

Immediately Sirius dropped the act in his enthusiasm for ice-cream "really? You would? That'd be great! Thank you so much!"

Laughing Nikki realized that first impressions could be extremely misleading, that Sirius was actually a very funny and very friendly boy. Nikki nodded at the bent, white-haired, old man who sat at the counter, behind an old fashioned cash register.

"Hullo Sam, may we go on through?" she asked him.

Tearing his gaze from the large tome that he was reading, he marked his place with his finger, he smiled at her "'course Nikki, you don't have to ask no more. I know your no muggle." He spared Sirius a small smile before returning to his reading.

"Thanks Sam, have a good day." Nikki replied already walking past the store-owner and into a small cramped hallway behind him.

She stopped at the end of the hall, in front of the men's washroom. Pushing open the door Nikki ushered Sirius in to the cramped space, he shot her a confused look but otherwise kept his mouth shut. Pulling out her wand Nikki approached a urinal, she looked at it for several seconds before tapping a white, stained tile three to the left of the urinal, muttering under her breath she moved her wand down two rows of tile and tapped another tile and then moved her wand and tapped the tile that sat five tiles up from the top of the urinal. For a second nothing happened and Sirius was just about to voice his doubts about her sanity when the tiles began to shift, crawling across the wall they formed an arch way and the urinal sank into the ground to give them access to what a large street sign proclaimed to be Diagon Alley. Nikki strode through unimpressed, but Sirius just stood there gaping in awe.

Glancing back she remembered that he was muggle-born and so with a smirk she called out to him "you'd better come through quickly, it'll close soon. And close your mouth before something flies in and lays eggs." His head jerked up at the sound of her voice, as if he'd forgotten that she was there, shaking his head and closing his mouth he shot a quick, half-hearted glare at her and then walked quickly through the archway and into Diagon Alley. Immediately he was hit with the wall of noise, the sound of people talking, squawks and squeaks, barking and roaring from the menageries, small explosive noises, bangs and pops as people apparated and disaperated, other explosions and bangs from spells and wands, made a deafening wall of sound.

"Follow me and stay close, it's quite busy here today." Nikki said loudly in Sirius's ear, making him jump. He nodded quickly, not able to say anything, so overwhelmed was he by all of the sights.

Nikki strode off into the crowd and Sirius hurried to follow, they twisted and weaved their way down the street until Sirius heard faint merry tinkling, that he normally associated with an ice cream van but in this case heralded a small ice cream parlor, with a number of quant tables with large, multi-coloured, umbrellas at each.

"What's your favorite flavor?" Nikki asked him bending down a bit.

"Um… chocolate? I don't really have one." He replied while glancing up at the menu which was crowded with flavors.

"Well then I'll choose one for you." Nikki replied cheerily "why don't you go and save us a seat?"

"O.k." Sirius replied and slipped away quietly to find Nikki and him a table.

Several minutes later Nikki appeared pushing through the crowd, with two large ice-creams, one was a mix of dark, royal purple and deep chocolate brown, the other was a mélange of lime green, yellow and indigo. She thrust the purple and brown ice-cream at him and commanded him to enjoy it.

"It's good isn't it!" she said sucking on her eastery one.

"mhmmm" was Sirius's only reply as he set into the darker coloured cone.

They passed the next several minutes in relative silence as they both set about finishing of their ice cream.

"Sooo…." Nikki said trailing off as she wracked her brain for a good topic of conversation "so, from what you said earlier it sounds like you have a lot of uncles… what are they like? Do you have anymore family?"

"Yep, my dad has four brothers and one sister" Sirius replied "I like Uncle Garry the best; he's the one in jail."

"Oh… is he nice?" Nikki asked a little shocked.

"Yep, before he was put in the slammer he used to take me to circus's every now and then and to these really nice places with ladies in bright costumes and feathers! Yep, Uncle Garry was definitely the best…" Sirius trailed off slowly, staring at his ice cream but not really seeing it.

"Well, we really should be moving a long now. We've got lots of places to go and lots of things to pick up, so we'd better get started." Nikki said cheerfully levating her both of their trash into a trash can. "Come on, first stop Gringotts!"

The two of them climbed the steps of Gringotts together, Sirius tripped twice due to the fact that he was staring at the mix of different witches and wizards that swirled around him. Nikki held the door open for him and he walked in, only to stop dead, his eyes following a goblin that was walking by with a plate full of rubies.

"Holy shit, those are the biggest freagin' rubies that I've ever scene! And that wrinkly thing carrying them is pretty cool to." He exclaimed in a voice tinged with awe.

The goblin gave him a nasty glare, full of loathing and muttered something that sounded like "filthy… dirty… stupid… wizard spawn…" Sirius just flipped him off.

Nikki glared at Sirius sternly "Sirius, you shouldn't use that kind of language and Goblins have the same feelings as everybody else. I'm sure you wouldn't appreciate being called a pink-skinned raisin!"

"A pink skinned raisin?" Sirius said skeptically "I like it!"

Shaking her head, Nikki sighed in mock despair "what am I going to do with you?"

They cued up and waited for a counter to open up; as soon as one did Nikki darted forward, dragging Sirius with her, beating a large woman with a sour face by a few seconds. She turned and faced the wizened, sliver haired goblin behind it and smiled politely.

"Good-day, my name is Vicetrap, how may I be-" he was cut off by Sirius snickering loudly.

"Micetrap? That's the queerest name I've ever heard, this world is absolutely loony! Completely bonkers!" he said loudly, Nikki cringed and opened her mouth to apologize.

The old goblin had adopted a long suffering expression on his face and continued on with his speech with a little more force "how may I be of service?"

Before Sirius could come up with a smart response to that, Nikki clapped her hand over his mouth and putting o her best smile said, "I'd like to exchange some muggle money for wizard currency please." She pushed the money that Sirius's father had given her, it wasn't much because he'd just invested in an old car that he was going to use for spare parts. Swiftly counting it up in her head she realized that there was only 47$. Sirius would never be able to afford all of his school supplies.

Vicetrap sorted the bills from smallest to largest and then piled the coins with the bigger ones on the bottom and the smaller on top.

The old goblin then opened a plain wooden box that was imbedded in the counter and counted out the right amount of galleons, sickles and knuts into his hand and then deposited the pile of coins in front of Nikki.

"Would that be all?" he asked in a nasally voice, glancing at Sirius with distain.

"Yes, that all. Thank you" Nikki replied, scraping the coins into a cheap money pouch that she had picked up earlier.

"Have a good day" the goblin replied in voice that said he hoped that they had the worst day possible and that a toilet seat would fall out of the sky and squish Sirius.

As they walked out of Gringotts, Nikki glanced at Sirius out of the corner of her I casually, to make sure he wasn't watching her as she slipped a handful of extra coins into the pouch. Withdrawing her hand quickly she opened the door for the two of them and they walked out into the bright sunlight.

"Don't think I don't know what you're doing." Sirius told her in a heated voice.

"I don't know what you-" he cut her off before she could even get half her sentence out.

"I don't need your charity!" he told her angrily, glaring at her from underneath his bangs.

"It's not… charity." Nikki stuttered, trying to come up with a decent lie. "It… it was a donation from Hogwarts… a bursary." Nikki ventured hoping the foreign word would throw Sirius off.

"I don't know what a bursary is and I don't give a damn! I can tell your lying, take back your money!" he told her stubbornly and then repeated "I don't need your charity!"

Nikki looked at the angry, resentful young boy in front of her and sighed "alright, I'll take it back. I'm sorry, I only wanted to help."

"I don't need your help…" he mumbled, but his voice was softer and he shot her a quick grin to show that he had forgiven her.

Nikki reached back into the bag and removed about a quarter of the money that she had put in. "There we go, its all your own now. In fact why don't you carry it, but don't even think of running off! I've got my eye on you." She said mock threateningly.

"Where do we go from here?" Sirius asked in confusion, looking up and down the street.

"Where ever you want to go Sirius, where ever you want." Nikki told him with a broad grin, gesturing to the street filled with bustling people in front of them "Diagon Alley at your service."


End file.
